My body price.

Monday, July 2, 2007

$4575.00The Cadaver Calculator - Find out how much your body is worth
Now I want everyone to stay away from me. I know what you're all thinking: You could get a Playstation 3 and one game with that money.

I see you with that candlestick, Colonel Mustard. Back off. I am not going in the library with you.

I should point out too that Carrie and I have something in common: we share a love of Gary Oldman. Except mine is probably much less creepy than hers. God only knows what sort of stories she writers. Shudder.

In my case, though, I adored him in two other roles.

That one dude from Fifth Element, one of the finest science fiction films ever made (for a lot of reasons, one of them being Michael Bay was nowhere near it.)

And then as James Gordon, in Batman Begins, where amidst one of the bestest movies EVER, he delivered a wonderful performance. I look forward to him in the upcoming sequel The Dark Knight. His best piece in Batman Begins was when he comforted a young Bruce Wayne. He's a very, very good actor who doesn't make a big deal out of it.

And then, of course, there's Sirius Black. While the character was something of a wash for me in Prisoner of Azkaban (the book; not the movie), probably because Harry starts seeing a big black dog at the same time as SIRIUS BLACK escapes from prison. Here I am, knowing that Sirius means dog, and his last name is black. Duh.

I like the character anyway. And although we didn't really see him in Goblet of Fire, he was really good at being completely unhinged in Azkaban.

The reason I don't immediately equate him with that role was that it wasn't until I watched the movie on DVD, a little while ago, and suddenly went "Holy shit, that's Gary Oldman!"

I hadn't connected it.

Okay, this was a longer post that I meant. I was just coming to tell you how valuable my body is and that I'll be raising my rates.

ADDENDENDENDENDUM: I can't believe I made a post about Prisoner of Azkaban without pointing out HOW INCREDIBLY STUPID THE TIME-TURNER BUSINESS WAS.

Honestly...

7 Angst(s):

Peter Damien said...

http://sluggy.com/daily.php?date=050918

Carrie's seen it, like, thirty million times now. It's for the rest of you who might argue "Hey, the Time-Turner was an important plot device, not some stupid deus ex machina!"

Okay, you probably weren't going to argue that anyway.

I should go work, shouldn't I?

Carrie said...

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... Gary Oldman... Mmmmmmmm...

Thanks for kicking my day off on the right foot. *GRIN*

Which rates are you raising, exactly?

Peter Damien said...

Yanno. My...rates. *nudge* *wink* *nudge*

Ask RT. He knows. He's in debt.

Lori A. Basiewicz said...

My body is apparently more interesting than yours, Pete. It's worth $5575.

Why work? The campus library has WiFi.

Rllgthunder said...

That's because you have breasts. This makes the price go up.

And ignore Pete, Carrie. I think he's been touching himself again.

Lori A. Basiewicz said...

Eh. Not if you're trying to find a job, it doesn't. Women are seriously underpaid as a whole.

Peter Damien said...

So are men, for that matter.

Well. Me.